Read it and weep. These are numbers only a hitting coach could love, although it did make for an entertaining game.

Kissimmee, Fla., March 6, 2011 — Following eight days of largely ineffective offense, I dreamed of hits Saturday night. Perhaps tonight I’ll dream of winning $1 million. The Yanks outlasted the Astros in Kissimmee 10-8 Sunday afternoon, outhitting the home club 21-17. A wind that was blowing out to all fields probably had a greater effect than any visions during my slumber, or at least that’s what most fans present were thinking, I’m sure.

The clubs evenly split four home runs, with Alex Rodriguez and Greg Golson going yard for the Yanks, a team that had cleared a total of three fences in eight games coming in. But even though “only” four balls left the field, outfielders were running back toward the wall and into the gaps all game. The Astros outdid the Yanks in this respect, collecting the contest’s only two triples, and whipping the visitors in extra base hits, 10 to six. Carlos Lee hit the longest home run, but Alex had nothing to be ashamed of as his cleared near the park’s deepest point in left center.

Cano, Jeter, and Rodriguez trot off the field together and toss the ball back and forth as they do once Robbie closed the fourth by snagging a pop-up. The fans in other cities are literally thrilled to see these stars in their parks, and are deeply disappointed if they do not make the trip.

The teams had an error apiece, although there were other mistakes. Yankee closer David Phelps was called for a balk in the ninth inning to put the tying runs into scoring position, but the righty also picked one-time Yankee Jimmy Paredes, who would be charged (incorrectly, in my opinion) with the Houston error, off first in the eighth. Eduardo Nunez pulled a rock in the ninth, looking to second and losing his chance at the second out of the ninth on a grounder to short, and he and Kevin Russo failed to turn a critical double play in seventh. Andruw Jones lost a routine fly ball in the sun that led to a run in the second inning. And any Yankee fan of a certain age had to wince as Jordan Parraz, holding at second to make sure a Daniel Brewer double in the seventh fell, circled third base with Justin Maxwell, breaking immediately from first, close enough that they could have been passing a baton between them in a relay race. As it was, Parraz was pegged out, but Maxwell managed to retreat to third to avoid a repeat of a Dale Berra/Bobby Meacham fiasco from about 25 years ago.

But on the flip side, Jones made a diving catch of a liner to close the second, southpaw Steve Garrison snagged a Bill Hall hot shot to the box in the sixth, and Brewer made a fine running grab of a liner to right on the next play. But these pale when compared to the work of Colin Curtis, who preceded Brewer in right. He ran to the wall to run down Hunter Pence’s drive to right center in the third, threw Brian Dopirak out at the plate on a Humberto Quintero double in the fourth, and crashed to the grass hard corralling a liner to right to close the fifth, a play that injured him and removed him from the game, but not before he contributed a sac fly to the cause. It’s worth pointing out here that Brewer, who replaced Curtis in right, was also injured, perhaps spraining an ankle as he collided with first baseman Paredes in the ninth on Oswaldo Navarro’s high throw, although the error was incorrectly assigned to Paredes. Daniel successfully bunted the winning runs into scoring position on the play, and one run scored on the error. Thus, the Yanks play their first split-squad games tomorrow down two outfielders.

Steve Garrison warms up, readying to take over for Phil Hughes, during the third inning. Garrison held Houston in check as the Yanks built a not-healthy-enough lead.

All 11 pitchers, five for the Yanks and six for the ‘stros, suffered from the light air and consistent breeze that made the ball fly all game. Given the conditions, Phil Hughes’s work was passable, as he retired nine guys on 40 pitches. One of the five hits he surrendered was the ball Jones lost in the sun, but Phil deserved to be on the losing side of a 3-2 score after three because he allowed both home runs, a problem he has experienced before. Brian Anderson, a former White Sox outfielder trying to remake himself as a right-hander in Yankee camp, had the worst day, surrendering five hits and three runs while getting two outs in the seventh. If there’s a pitching star awarded on a 38-hit day, it goes to lefty Garrison, who restored some sanity over three innings following Hughes, allowing but one run on three hits and a walk. Righty David Phelps gets the grit award, because although he surrendered the tying run in the eighth and allowed four hits and a walk in two innings, he made a key pickoff, survived Nunez’s brain lock and his own balk in the ninth, and struck out two straight to end the game with the tying runs in scoring position. Want some more buzz? It was Koby Clemens, son of a somewhat famous ex-ballplayer, whom Phelps struck out to end the game.

Any points David Phelps lost by giving up the lead in the eighth were recovered when he struck out the last two Astros with the tying runs in scoring position.

It was quite an offensive explosion the Bombers put on today. With two Yankees batting per position (Melky Mesa ran in the ninth and played outfield, but did not hit), the tandems of Derek Jeter and Nunez at short, and Jones and Parraz in left field, contributed four hits each, with all four players reaching safely twice. Justin Maxwell scored twice following his two hits; and A-Rod and center fielder Austin Crum collected two rbi’s apiece.

Osceola County Stadium was among the most modern of Spring Training ballparks when it was built in 1985 and the Astros took up residence. But although it has charming touches, including comfortable and spacious seats and cup holders, it lacks many of the amenities in the new parks that have sprung up in the last decade. The resident pro-Astros community seems to have accepted that the swarms of Yankee fans who fill their facility to bursting a few times each March are a beneficent visitation, and they took the “Let’s Go Yankees” cheers that boomed from the stands for much of the game with good humor. Good feeling aside however, one look at the ugly numbers that populated the scoreboard once the game went final makes it fitting that this baseball battle took place on the 175th anniversary of the battle for the Alamo, except in this case the teams were more evenly matched.

And one other thing. The Florida city from which the Astros transplanted their spring training facility 26 years ago was Coco Beach, also a setting for a pretty famous TV sit-com from yesteryear. If you don’t get my title now, Google it:

I Dream of Hitting

BTW,TYW
YANKEE BASEBALL!!!